Most of us believe that life goes on after death, but it doesn’t seem to make moving on from loss any easier. We may also feel guilt finding love after the death of a spouse, but mediums that talk to the dead can help us reconnect with deceased loved ones and show us that the spirit world only wants what is best for us. So, with this in mind, find out all about grieving, mourning and how to contact a dead loved one in this article today. In this article we will explore
Dealing with Grief
We grieve for many different reasons in life. We grieve the end of a relationship, the loss of a job or even when moving out of a house we have made countless memories in. However, possibly the worst thing that can happen to us in life is the loss of loved ones. It’s a sad reality of life that most of us will have to experience, but knowing that this type of pain is universal still doesn’t seem to make it any easier. When the worst does happen, all of us grieve in our own ways, and there is certainly no ‘correct way’ to grieve. For some, getting out there and distracting themselves as much as possible is what helps them deal with the pain, while for others, taking time to sit through all the various emotions is what is needed in that moment. That said, there is a famous psychological model that states that a person encounters five different stages of emotion when going through the grieving process. However, these five stages are merely a guideline, as everyone’s grief journey is wholly unique. As such, we cannot look at those who are grieving and make judgment. What we can do, however, is provide a safe space for the bereaved to come to us for comfort shall they need it.
What is the Difference Between Grieving and Mourning?
When we talk about dealing with death, the matter of grieving and mourning is inevitable. However, often use these terms interchangeably, or are at least confused by how they differ. So, with that in mind, grief is the emotional aspect of dealing with loss. It is both the rush of emotions we feel when death initially occurs, and it's the long-lasting hole left in our hearts years later. While grief is not the same for everyone, grief is simply the matter of how we deal with loss emotionally. On the other hand, mourning is taking these internal thoughts and emotions, and expressing them outwardly. Again, just like grief, the process of mourning is entirely unique to the person going through it, but there are certain things that many people find comfort in doing. For instance, mourners may take solace in journaling their emotions, listening to songs that remind them of their loved one or placing flowers at their graveside. Lighting a candle for the dead is also a lovely way to show you are thinking of that person. These actions are ways in which people can take the grief that sits within them and express them in a tangible way. Think of it like getting something off your chest - when we share our problem, we lift some of the burden it weighs on us.
Life after Loss
After experiencing the unimaginable, it can be daunting to think about picking up the pieces and starting life over. Learning to live again may even feel completely impossible in the early stages of grief, but it can always be done. Outlined below are four ways in which the bereaved can begin their personal healing journey.
Therapy
Seeking help from a therapist or counselor specializing in bereavement is a fantastic way to unload many of the emotions a person may be feeling while receiving productive, qualified advice. A large part of their advice seeks to help a person control their grief, rather than letting grief control them. A therapist is also likely to help explain the grief and mourning journey to this person, to help them make sense of the emotional whirlwind they are likely to be experiencing. Understanding how the brain operates after a tragedy, and learning how it can slowly repair itself, is a great way to begin the healing journey.
Reaching Out to Others
Reaching out and connecting with others who are currently going through a bereavement is a great way for people to feel solidarity during these tough times. While friends and family who aren’t dealing with grief may still offer plenty of comfort and support, connecting with people who truly understand the type of pain being experienced is incredibly helpful. This way, stories and feelings can be shared amid the backdrop of mutual understanding.
Socializing
The point at which a bereaved person wants to begin socializing again will vary immensely. For some, the need to be surrounded by others may come almost instantaneously, whereas for others, it could be years down the line before attending a social event. Whatever the situation at hand may be, socializing can be a great way to ease the emotional burden of death. Being with friends and family serves as a great chance to express how you feel and prevent grief from internalizing too far. That said, even if sharing your pain is too raw for the time being, being social is a nice way to earn a well-needed distraction.
Spirituality
One way to ease the pain of losing a loved one is by thinking spiritually. The idea that life ends completely at the death of the physical body doesn’t sit right for a lot of people, even people who wouldn’t consider themselves spiritual at all. There seems to be a universal belief for most people from almost all cultures and religions around the world, that there is a physical body and an intangible spirit - and that even after death, the spirit lives on. The way in which this spirit lives on varies widely according to each different belief system, but the idea that our loved ones can still be in your presence, even after their physical form has departed this earth, is incredibly comforting nonetheless.
Love After Death
When a loved one dies, much of our pain can stem from the perceived inability to love them as we once did. We want nothing more than to share our major life events with them, revel in each others’ company and simply tell them we love them. When we can’t do these things, the pain can be unbearable, but changing our attitude towards loving after death is important for our healing journey. We need to remember that love does not die when we lose someone - we can show our love by cherishing old memories, talking to them, carrying their possessions with us and so forth. However we choose to love our lost ones is completely up to us. Take faith in the knowledge that the spirits of our loved ones are always around and they know and appreciate the love that we show them here on earth.
Dating After Loss of a Spouse
While showing love to our dead is very much possible, showing romantic love to new partners after the death of a spouse is a complicated yet beautiful thing. Those who are going through this journey are likely to feel a lot of conflicting emotions, guilt and anxiety about letting a new lover into their life. They may wonder what their previous spouse thinks from the spirit world and even worry about the opinions of friends and family in the current moment. These concerns are natural, but not necessary, as learning to love again after a death is a wholly personal experience. On top of this, our lovers in spirit do not possess the same jealousies and insecurities that we do in this life. They are stripped back to their goodness of their core and want nothing but happiness for us here on earth. Making sure to choose a new partner who can respect the place a previous lover has in our hearts is paramount though. Finding love again is never about replacing anyone, and don’t forget that.
Can the Dead Feel Your Love?
The thing about contacting dead loved ones is that it doesn’t have to look like the way we contact those in the living. You want him or her close, but we all know that we can’t pick up the phone or send a text to a loved one in the spirit world. However, the answer is simple; we connect with spirit and show our love to them through our own spirit. We may be existing in different realms, but the thoughts, feelings and emotions we hold for our spirit lovers are received and appreciated nonetheless. Many of us may imagine there to be a huge, physical separation between the earthly and spiritual realms, but this is also not the case. The two realms exist amongst one another, intertwined and deeply connected on the same level. Spirits walk among us and experience life alongside us, we just aren’t always aware that this is the case. Once you have accepted this reality, it is easier to take comfort from it.
How To Communicate With a Deceased Loved One?
Can we talk to the dead? Moving on after the death of a loved one is incredibly challenging, but learning that the spirit world is within reaching distance can bring us great comfort. Knowing this, learning how to communicate with dead loved ones is a great way to keep our love with them alive. While it may take some time and patience, any one of us can develop the techniques needed to make contact with spirit.
In Our Dreams
Many people might wonder; ‘can the dead communicate through dreams?’ Well, one of the most vivid ways to make contact with the dead is when we are sleeping. Many people who have lost someone close to them in life may report having dreams where their loved one appears, in their best form, and incredibly vividly. These dreams are not to be mistaken for any other dream, rather, they are incredibly profound spiritual visitations. While it may be hard to say the things you want to during these dreams, learning to acknowledge that they are, indeed, a brief visit from a deceased loved one is the first step. Over time, your subconscious will learn to let go of control and allow you to dream lucidly, communicating everything you’ve ever wanted to with them.
Meditation
Meditation is also a great way to make contact with the spirit world. When we meditate, we raise our vibrational frequencies and allow our minds to be reached by those in different realms. Our mind and souls become reachable for spirits, and as such, they can communicate their messages with us. Learning to meditate to this level will take time and patience, but it is still very much possible. Start by sitting comfortably and quieting the mind. Then speak with your loved one and call for them to connect with you. Invisage the energy from your body expanding outwards and encroaching upon the spirit world. After repeating this meditative process a number of times, you may start to receive spiritual messages.
Psychic Mediums
Arguably the best way to talk to dead loved ones is by reaching out to a psychic medium. In the simplest terms, a psychic medium is someone that talks to the dead by utilizing the practice of clairvoyance when receiving messages from the spirit world. They are able to hear, see, feel, or even smell the presence of a spirit, but it is the act of contacting the deceased that differentiates a psychic from a psychic medium. Contacting the dead with the help of a psychic medium may reap the clearest ‘results’, as we are able to physically hear the message being sent to us. It can be an overwhelming experience to say the least, but it is certainly nothing short of miraculous to be able to make contact with our loved ones in this way.
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